Taking the CST

I took the CST this past weekend. I put off taking the godforsaken exam for as long as I possibly could, but I couldn’t put it off any longer. This is what I have to do to be a teacher, I had to continue telling myself; just get it over with.

I checked in to the testing area at 7:45 am and began taking the test by 8:30. For the first hour of the test, I was practically asleep. In order to get to the test on time, I had to get up at 6. It was an early morning, and I had late nights all week because of work and class and homework. I was exhausted, and I could not process anything I was reading. But whatever.

But then there were the seats. I couldn’t find a comfortable position to sit in. And, of course, I couldn’t move around much because I didn’t want to disturb the people to my left and right. And, yes, there were three test-takers to a table, and I was lucky enough to get the middle seat. Oh joy. But never mind that.

As I continued to take the test, I found myself racing the clock. I had so many more questions to answer and an essay to write and not a lot of time left. I’ve always been a slow reader. Just pace yourself, I thought.

But then I would get distracted as the test-givers would walk around the room. Sometimes a passage I read reminded me of a class I took or a paper I wrote. And then I thought about all the work I had to do after the test. Then I got hungry. It was just one thing after another.

Unfortunately, standardized tests don’t factor in how much sleep you had that week or the conditions you work best under or how much you really know. What do they measure again? Good question. All I know is, if I failed that test, I won't have the chance to explain why to anyone. I’ll have no choice but to sit through it again, distractions and all.

More than Capable

Every person is capable of writing.

Up until the tenth grade, I hated writing. Okay, let’s say I greatly disliked it (hate is such a strong word). I greatly disliked grammar. I greatly disliked thesis statements. I greatly disliked topic sentences. I greatly disliked brainstorming, transitioning, and revising. You name it – I greatly disliked it all.

When I wrote, I felt defeated. I used commas incorrectly. My thesis statements that I worked hours on were never good enough. And don’t get me started about topic sentences. I was lucky if I landed a B- on a paper; writing well seemed like an impossible task. My tenth grade English teacher, however, taught me otherwise.

Unlike any other teacher I had, Mrs. Schmidt invested in me. She spent time with me everyday, in and out of class. Because of her, I learned that writing is a process, one that I’m capable of doing.

As I sit here seven years later, a teacher in the making (hopefully someone similar to Mrs. Schmidt), I wonder how I’m going to help my students with their writing. How will I engage the students who “greatly dislike” writing? How do I encourage students who have already given up? How can I help students see how important writing is? And how do I help students see that every person is, in fact, capable of writing?

Going

Welcome to my blog! Readers, I have to warn you, I’ve never blogged before. I’ve secretly wanted to but never knew what to post about. Quite honestly, I still don’t have a clue, so I plan to write about anything and everything…minus politics. I don’t do politics – not well at least. So, I may write about world peace one week and a movie I watched another week. Perhaps I’ll blog about a childhood memory, an interaction I had on the train, my family, a class I’m taking, my healthy obsession with the color green, or my writer’s block. I may even dabble in some classical literature. Who knows? I most certainly don’t. I plan to just go with it.